Fiercely

A poem on the birth of my daughter.

velveteen are these cheeks, I think
I press my skin against 
hers, inhaling milk
and newborn scent
it’s heaven, a kind of
drug


kicking feet and darting
eyes, she squawks as she
moves from my shoulder to chest
listening as this heart
it beats
fiercely


I smooth her hair, cup her
head and face
wake with her night cries and
soothe her, pacing the cold
December porch

they had told me one last
push, she was almost there as
I split open, and thought
birth is war, that’s the truth of it
there is no option
to lose


with a last battle of
strength, she arrived with
eyes open and howling
fiercely


ready for my breast
latching as if breathing and
pride found me, my girl
so strong and ready 
to live

I looked down after 
pushing out the placenta
the cord was cut and stitches were 
sewn, bloodied but
alone at last


looking into your face
a face that I grew, your face
I had waited for and 
at once, I loved you
fiercely


you are mine, my limbs and
skin and lungs
you have my very own
beating heart

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